Echoes of a Word
by sherlockthecockblock
Summary: After Jim wakes up, Spock comes to visit.


Captain James Kirk is sitting up just three hours after waking up from a two-week-long coma, and Doctor McCoy is swearing at him to _lie back down you stubborn son-of-a-bitch_. Spock has observed this behavior between the two of them before and has decided that the insults are not personal and that McCoy is, in fact, simply concerned for the Captain's well-being. Since Kirk is currently coming off of literally dying from radiation poisoning, Spock thinks that the doctor's rebukes are worth listening to, not that Kirk will- it's not in his nature.

Kirk notices Spock in the doorway to his room in Starfleet's secure recovery center and brightens noticeably. "Spock!" he exclaims, trying to sit up a little straighter and stopping when McCoy pushes his shoulder back into the bed. "I'd greet you, but Doctor Tight-Ass over here has confined me to bed rest," Kirk confides in a stage-whisper as Spock approaches, knowing that McCoy can hear him.

"How many times will I have to explain to you that you nearly _died?_" McCoy growls, checking another vital sign on the medical equipment next to Kirk's bed. Kirk doesn't notice the slight shake in McCoy's hands, but Spock does. He's also pondering the doctor's choice of words- _nearly _died?

"Doctor, I can keep an eye on the Captain's vitals for the time being. You've been in active duty for three days and Starfleet regulations require-"

"I know the damn regulations," McCoy mutters, waving him off. "Don't let him do anything stupid."

"You know me, Bones," Kirk interjects. "I'm not stupid."

"No, but you act it," McCoy returns, leaving the room.

"Can you believe him?" Kirk asks Spock, rolling his eyes. "Just because I pull one or two death-defying stunts- Spock?" Spock realizes he's staring at the Captain a little too intensely for human conversation. Kirk's flippant attitude toward his own personal safety is beginning to bother him in ways he does not yet understand, ways beyond "keeping-the-Captain-alive-for-the-sake-of-the-cre w" or "James-Kirk-has-no-concept-of-what-might-kill-him" .

"I apologize, Captain, but-"

"Spock, please, we're both off-duty," Kirk interrupts him. "My name is Jim."

"I am aware of what your name is."

"Then call me it," Kirk presses.

"Jim." Spock collects his thoughts, but a polite way to breach the topic he wishes to discuss escapes him. He settles for a more generic beginner. "How are you doing?"

"I'm going _crazy_," Kirk says emphatically, pronouncing each syllable individually. "Bones won't let me do _anything_. I've been here for three whole days- well, two weeks and a day, I guess…" Kirk trails off at the look on Spock's face. "Something's bothering you, what is it?"

"What did Doctor McCoy tell you about your… incident?" Spock asks carefully. Kirk frowns.

"That when I went under- from the radiation- you went after Khan, and I nearly died, but they used his blood to fix me." Kirk sits up and Spock doesn't stop him. "Is there something else? Did he lie to me?"

"No," Spock answers. "He just did not tell you the entirety of the truth." Kirk waits calmly for Spock to tell him what he deserves to know. _It is logical that he should know._

"When you were locked in the flood chamber…" Spock falters. "Your heart stopped." Spock looks down. "You died. For nearly an hour. When Doctor McCoy managed to bring you back, you were in the coma for two weeks and he wasn't sure you would pull through."

"I died." Kirk folds his hands together. "Why didn't anyone tell me?"

"Possibly Doctor McCoy thought that in your compromised state, the information would be too much for you to handle," Spock suggests. "I assumed he would have told you, as you are his Captain."

"I guess..." Kirk runs a hand through his hair. "He did say you went after Khan alone."

"I did. Speed was necessary, and it was only logical-"

"To risk your life?" Kirk raises an eyebrow. "That was pretty damn stupid of you, Spock."

"Maybe I was simply emotionally compromised," Spock retorts, fondly observing Jim's smile.

"Bones, um... he also seemed to think you've been in the way a lot these past two weeks," Jim says apologetically. "Hanging around here 'like a lost puppy', in his words. You haven't been a nuisance, have you?"

"In my defense, the doctor refused to take the regulated breaks and would not allow other members of the hospital's medical staff to take over his place," Spock tells Jim. "I believe he did not trust them to look after you, but he would leave if I were here."

"Never thought I'd see the day when you two were friendly." Jim smirks at something, a memory, most likely. He seems to think for a moment, his face changing and falling, then blurts out, "You couldn't choose not to feel."

"No."

"Why not?" Jim breathes, far too curious but so truly _Jim _that Spock feels compelled to answer honestly. _Vulcans do not lie._

"It's as if..." Spock thinks a moment. "Let me start at the beginning.

"When I was growing up on Vulcan, I had no close friends. They would not accept me as one of their own, because of my human mother." Brief memories flit across his mind- _Look at his human eyes_- but he brushes them away. "All I had was my intellect. As we grew, the taunting stopped, and like many of my classmates, I began to think of my future. I applied to the Vulcan Science Academy. I was accepted, and for a moment, I thought I could finally be completely Vulcan, not having to teeter on the line between my parents. But they still brought my differences to the forefront of the conversation. I declined admittance."

"You're _kidding_." Jim sits up. "We're talking the Vulcan Science Academy, _the _Vulcan Science Academy, the one that no one passes up a chance to attend? You had the balls to do that?"

"I did," Spock says, feeling a small satisfaction. "I joined Starfleet as my secondary option and was programming their tests within two years. Of course, it wasn't easy all of the time- being the non-dominant species on a planet rarely is. I was accused of cheating by fellow cadets seven times in a single semester." Spock thinks of the testing, becoming a commander to Captain Pike. "Even then, no one was as kind to me as you were."

"Dude, you threw me out onto a deserted planet, and I bullied you into giving up your captaincy," Jim reminds him.

"Perhaps not initially," Spock concedes. "But over time... You've been a better friend than I could have ever hoped for, Jim. And because I have never had this type of... companionship with any other being, that is why couldn't choose not to feel."

Jim hesitates, then puts his hand over Spock's. "Thank you, Spock. It means a lot."

Spock nods, then, unsure of why exactly he's telling Jim this. "There's a Vulcan word, _t'hy'la_. It means a lot of things, foremost among them 'friend'."

"T'hy'la," Jim murmurs, rolling the word off his tongue almost experimentally. It's a little more musical in his voice. "I like it." A nurse Jim vaguely recognizes enters the room to check his vitals just as Spock's communicator goes off. Spock moves his hand to answer it.

"Commander Spock here."

"Sir, zhey are requesting your presence in ze Conference Room on Lewel Four," Chekov's cheery voice tells him.

"Tell the Admiral I am on my way presently," Spock answers at the same time Jim exclaims, "Chekov! How are ya, kid?"

"I- I will do zat, Commander," Chekov falters, clearly caught off guard by two voices having answered him. "It is good to hear from you, Keptin. We will be returning to ze Enterprise in no time, sir!"

"Can't wait," Jim laughs. "Sorry I'm keeping Spock from important business, he's on the way."

"Thank you, Ensign," Spock says firmly, closing the communicator. He stands as the nurse makes her way around him to fiddle with something on Jim's board and walks to the door.

"Hey, Spock," Jim says quietly. Spock turns back. "You said that word meant other things?"

"Yes." Spock pauses. "It could also mean 'brother'... or 'lover'," he says softly enough that Jim isn't sure he heard correctly.

"Will you come back after your meeting?" Jim finds himself asking. Spock does that thing that's not quite a smile, but is close enough.

"If you would like me to." Jim nods, and Spock tilts his head. "Then I will be seeing you... Captain."


End file.
